Every once in a while I get sick. I have been feeling a little under the weather for a few days, tired, sore throat, heavy head, and low motivation. When I get sick I usually get grumpy and want to head to a cozy cave and have people wait on me bringing me exactly what I want when I want it. Did I mention that I have two kids? And it seems that the more space I want the less space I get, which makes me want more space. I get wrapped up in wanting that I loose sight of the space I have.
Today, I just wanted to sit on the couch and read a book (my husband will read this and be astonished that I actually had the desire to sit on the couch and do nothing!). My son who was home with me today would have nothing of it, we colored, read books, flipped through the Atlas Book of Dog Breeds of the World and then he asked for more. Now, being a little grumpy and having a sore throat, I needed a break; I told him we could read later. He looked concerned. Then, he crawled on my lap, looked me in the eyes, and put his hands on my throat. He gently rubbed my throat area for a minute, never losing eye contact. I relaxed and let him help me. Instead of moving onto something else, like another book or making lunch or distracting myself from the moment in some other way, I sat there and received his care. When he was done, he asked me if I felt better. Actually, I did feel better. And it got me to wondering, how frequently I get bound up in my wants that I forget to look at alternatives for healing, like my four year old sons healing hands.
Somehow he knew that what I really needed was to snuggle, read (Red Ted and the Lost Things, again) and be healed by touch. Didn’t I request someone to wait on me and give me what I wanted, when I wanted it? Only I rarely ask for what I want for fear that I have not done enough to ask that favor or I will have to do more work later to pay the favor back. My young son, free from the tally list of give and take, selflessly gave to me not exactly what I wanted but what I needed.
My question, how frequently do we get wrapped up in what we think we need given our constructed view of reality and not see the offerings in front of us? The offerings that could actually be what we need.
I challenge you to sit back and let someone give to you while you receive. Stay focused, keep breathing, and if you laugh, start over. Let the intimacy of receiving be the healing you need. You can even do this at work or at the grocery store, at home, with your family. Ask someone for something. Ask for something unreasonable. Then take a moment and trust that they will do what you ask. When you receive what you asked for, look them in the eye and thank them. Take another moment, to feel. If it feels strange, like you want to shake the feeling off your body, this is a good practice for you. Repeat four times.